Gnats

A gnat is any of several species of small flying insects that magically appear in the late spring and stick around until late autumn. Here and there they show up without seemingly any help from anyone. It is truly magical. Tiny life, once not here and then here.

I thought of this while waiting for the Nespresso to complete this morning. I was watching one of God’s creatures hop across the kitchen counter nearby as my cup was filling. To be honest, I was focused on whether it was a gnat or one of the floaters that occasionally appear in my vision. Gnat it was.

Imagine the world we live in from the view of the gnat. Big does not begin to describe it.

Imagine your universe … big does not…

This is the kind of thought experiment that I have when I allow myself to do it. We are all here doing the same thing. – Eat, survive, stay alive, reproduce. Why do we spend so much time getting in front of each other? If the hope was I would answer this question so that it could be rebutted with opulent dismissiveness, I cannot. I cannot answer why many are willing to advance unwanted or unasked for interference. I cannot answer why we cannot merely be present for each other.

Gnat is a term that means small fly. There are many species of tiny insects that are referred to as gnats in a general sense. Gnat is a generic term. Gnat is a stereotypical term. Stereotypes are assessments of a small group and extension of those assumptions to a larger group with a bias toward that larger group. The bias often comes from a sense of envy.

In the New Testament there is a story about an owner of an olive grove who hires day labor several times a day to pick his olives. At the end of the day the guys who worked all day became grumpy that they were not paid more than the guys that had only picked olives for a couple hours. They expected their deal to change simply because the olive grove owner was generous to the late comers. The early group was envious of the late comers good fortune.

Envy is a powerful force in life. Envy is all mental. The guys who worked all day could have celebrated the two hour workers’ good fortune instead of mourning their own perceived misfortune but they did not. They chose to be grumpy. The olive grove owner admonished them for their grumpiness.

Everywhere in the world people, animals, insects, plants, fungi are doing the same thing – eat, survive, stay alive, reproduce. Seemingly not recognizing that our fellow people, animals, insects, plants, fungi are doing the same. Recognizing that we are all doing the same thing in life brings peace to the soul. Some would call that woke, a slang term that intends to demean the idea of compassion for our fellow man. Peace only comes with the awareness of the needs of others.

We are all human on Earth with the same needs.

We are all gnats or smaller in the universe. Our needs do not change nor do others.

Carpe Diem.

Text Banter

All the puzzles were easy to do for me. Is it a good sign that I was able to do both the Wordle and Connections in the NY Times and solve them both rapidly? Some mornings my brain is alert and my favorite puzzles are easily solved. They are almost trivial.

Is that because I will be with Debbie today? Both of us have Friday off. We have a couple of activities planned. My heart is happy. My brain is anxious for our bantering conversation.

A typical morning text string from a few days ago:

You up?

Me, Of course but you are not sleeping late… (smiley face)Ÿ˜

Me, Happy Wednesday

Asleep before 10 so woke up by 6. Happy Wednesday ! 82 degrees today ! 15 percent chance if rain now. Very windy tho

Oops 50 percent

Me, Yep. Gayle is wearing red and black too

Me, Lonnie lost Wisconsin

Gayle? Weather looks bad tonight. Good to hear about Wisconsin . Lonnie needs to learn how to lose. He’s like a spoiled 5yr. old.

Me, BMWs will be more expensive tomorrow

Darn I’ll get mine today then.

Me, (smiley face)Ÿ˜Š

Wanna come?

Me, In general? Or to get a beemer?

100 percent knew you’d say that. Yes and yes

Me, You are incorrigible (smiley face)Ÿ

Thank you

Me, Hmmmm….

Me, Tuff schedule today?

Right? Lol. Only 6 today thank goodness.

Me, AustedoXR comes with a free coffee mug. It’s orange though.

Is that a bmw?

Should come with a free trip

Me, How come Donnie has so many blond haired women around him.

Me, Does no one else notice stuff like this?

Me, XR is some kind of drug for some thing.

Few people notice what you do.

Men in power frequently want blondes with big breasts around them. Just sayin

Me, I think Tara only has 3 pairs of shoes

Now I like her more.

Me, Hmmm… now I have to focus on tit’s. Hard to see past the podiums.

Where there’s a will there’s a way

Me, Eureka! A side view of whatshername reveals nice boobs. How do you know these things? Are you psychic?

You’re welcome. Yes I am psychic

Me, Huh. I imagine that can be burdensome on some days.

Kids at office say that too. Haha. they think I can read their minds. Yes I would actually not want to be psychic.

How’d you sleep?

Me, Pretty swell. I only woke up twice. I’m unwoke today.

Me, Wordle

Me, (picture of the puzzle)

Me, Going to look for more coffee

Good. And you are the opposite of unwoke. What’s the orange mean?

Me, (picture of the puzzle)

Me, S out of position

Did you get it?

Me, Yep… moving on to Connections

Well let me know if you need help. Haha

It is a common back and forth us and I love it. We are a little smartypants and a little flirty. It makes me laugh out loud.

Carpe Diem

Be It Resolved

This time of year many make resolutions for the new year. Me too, of course. My resolution to myself is to be a better me. And I have no idea what that means. Yet, the idea that I want to be a better me implies I know myself now and there are improvements that can be made for the better.

Do we ever really know ourselves? How old does one have to be before acceptance as is becomes the norm?

This past year as I passed through three quarters of a century and Cheryl did not, I began to emerge from a deep funk, a depression, the sadness of her death, the gladness of her death, half a decade of overwhelming anxiety about her care and looked toward an open road and at the new sunrise and wondered, what next?

A new person entered my life who knows me only as me, a man, single, a writer that exposes his emotions to the world, who tries to be of service to others around him, and maybe shares too much of himself. She does not seem to mind my nuances of self. Like everyone I have many of those nuances, sides, aspects. We seem to fit.

Another resolution, perhaps a better one is; stay in the moment. Being a better me is a look into the past and attempting to improve. Staying in the moment is not looking back. Nor is it planning for some future that may not come. For now fitting is enough.

These are thoughts that come to me as I think about a new relationship.

And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy. (Max Ehrmann)

Thanks Max for reminding me about life.

Carpe Diem.

Words, Wordle and Anagrams

An early morning wake-up activity for me is working my way through the Wordle, Quordle and Octordle, although I have little idea how to pronounce the last one. Being non-competitive does not mean that I do not enjoy intrinsic triumphs. I am a fan of crosswords, golf and trivia. All of these can have an externalized competitive setting but primarily these are the player versus the game itself. Nevertheless, words and word games are a fascination to me.

Occasionally working my way through these in the morning sparks other thoughts. An arbitrary word guess – because i am stuck and I have pecked in five letters to discover what my brain thinks about it – will turn into a valid word, often wrong, but valid. Campo was one of those. I am one of those who has several dictionaries and a couple bibles. I tend to look up bible citations and previously unknown words. “Campo” is a grassland plain in South America. (The Spanish and Portuguese got there first so they got to name things, I guess.)

In Octordle the object is to find all eight words in as few guesses as possible. My first two guesses are generally wasted while I hunt for vowels first. Once one of my vowel words showed all green but that was not my lowest score (low scores are best). Another internal fight I have with myself is to focus (or not) on a single word. Sometimes guesses are answers elsewhere. Those are just strategies. Today in one group all five letters where there after my third word entry (first guess). These were “r,a,t,e,h” sort of clumped in a corner grouping. EARTH or HEART are both good guesses here. I picked heart and I was incorrect. An anagram of both words is HATER which was the correct guess.

My brain whorled off into the ether. Heart versus hater. Light versus dark. Without a heart, one cannot live. Without hate not only can one live but life itself is brighter. An anagram is a simple rearrangement of the same letters. Perhaps we need more anagrams in our lives.

Carpe Diem or maybe Carpe Lucem!